If you have ex-spouse, and you are doing co-parenting, you are basically sharing child rearing responsibilities. You might have joint Sex Therapy custody with your ex spouse due to a court order, or it might be a formal arrangement of some sort. Regardless of how it goes down, it can be difficult and stressful for both parents and the child. If you pay attention to all of the essential factors, however, you and your kids can emerge from co-parenting without any major scars.
When a divorce occurs, it is very tempting for one parent to talk about the other to the child when they have it. So something that should be avoided at all costs. It is important to always be as positive as possible. A bad situation that happens with co-parenting is when both parents used the child as a pawn, criticizing each other, but only hurting the child and not themselves. If a parent is actually dating someone, they need to refrain from criticizing what the other parent is doing. This person is going to play a significant role in the child's life after all. You aren't doing the child any favors by trying to turn him or her against the other parent -or anyone who is close to the other parent. Is it ever a good idea, in a co-parenting situation, to talk to the ex spouse or not? There is no hard-line rule double parents must follow. You can figure this out by thinking about how your relationship is with your ex-spouse. If you cannot talk to them without a full blown argument erupting, it's best to keep contact to a bare minimum. If you can have a mutually amicable conversation from time to time, then meeting with each other to discuss plans about the kids is fine. If both of you are raising these children, you have to expect the other parent to be there when you are doing co-parenting. If you can talk civilly, then you should have conversations with each other, especially when it comes to the kids. Of course, if you can't do this, keep the conversations brief when discussing certain issues.
It can be very difficult for two parents who have recently separated to figure out co-parenting on their own. If the courts are not already involved, it is a good idea to look for outside help. One thing you can do is meet with a mediator. Some mediators specialize in co-parenting and are well equipped to help you navigate through issues like setting up the ideal schedule. They can also help iron out differences of opinion on how the child should be raised. You might not need to go through mediation for every little thing but it is a good idea if a situation is tense and you and your co-parent aren't able to work through it on your own. Therapists, religious advisers and counselors are good options as well if you need help navigating the waters of co-parenting.
Co-parenting can look like lots of things and it is important to work out an arrangement that works best for your individual circumstances. The above recommendations, however, are useful as general guidelines to help you keep matters on an even keel. When everything goes well, co-parenting can help your kids grow up while keeping good contact with both parents, even if they do not live together or share a relationship.